One of the most fun things I like to do is look at profile pictures. To me, they tell such a story. Each person has their own preferences as to how to portray themselves, but some pictures tell more of a story than others. And, if you look close enough, you can learn a heck of a lot more than I am thinking anyone wants you to know. Listen to this…..
1) The lead. One would like to think that everyone leads with a good, smiling photo. Uh, that is not the case. Trust me. Sullen, unsmiling, even angry faces with furrowed brows frequent the main profile picture. My only question is, “Why?” Why would you put a horrible representation of yourself online, especially as your lead? Are you kidding me?!? Something that runs through my head is that this picture is as good as ‘he’ gets. Let me get this straight. You had all the time in the world to get a decent picture. You could crop and groom and Photoshop it, and THIS is what you came up with? This is what you made you say, “Ah, yes. THIS captures me!” Dear god.
2) Shirtless men. Really? Please, I don’t need to say more, do I?
3) The good, ole’ bathroom mirror photo. Nothing says, “Hey, I really want to meet you” like a toilet in the background. What’s wrong buddy? Don’t have any friends to take a picture for you?
4) One. One and only one. There is only one profile picture, and it’s only a headshot. Would that concern you? What’s behind the double chin?
5) Animal Planet. I am an animal fan, do not get me wrong, but, if your profile pictures show image after image of your pet poodle, I am beginning to say you are more committed to your dog than you are to living your life. And, those poor animals. I wonder if they feel prostituted?
6) Kids. I cannot LIST the reasons NOT to post pictures of your kids online. First, let’s think safety. Pedophiles search websites. And, ladies, if you connect with a guy, meet him (when he can get your license number) or give him your number or even tell him relatively where you live, he knows that you have kids- usually their ages- the frequency in which they are home- and if you are a talking, you usually disclose information about your work schedule. To me, it is pure stupidity to post pictures of your kids on a dating site.
7) Action Shot. You know, one time, I went scuba diving in the Bahamas. Another time, I swam with dolphins. I do not, however, use photos from either of these activities to represent me in online dating. No, I am not an avid scuba diver. No, I am not a marine biologist. To me, placing such photos in my profile somewhat misrepresents me. I doubt I will ever swim with the dolphins again and I was terrified scuba diving. Now, what would I do if I attracted an avid scuba diver by my pictures? Do you really think he is going to convince me to go back out there in the shark-infested waters? So, let’s stick to simple, accurate shots that represent what I am on a daily basis.
8) My car. What, in god’s green earth, would motivate me to put a picture of my car…or my motorcycle…on my profile? When a man does that, I think, “So, if I am with him, all this could be mine?” Honestly, is that what you are seeking? Someone to use you? Or, does it send another message? “Hey, I am generally a loser. I am pretty darn ugly, but if you pick me, I will let you ride on the back of my cool bike.” I’m just sayin.
9) Mirror, mirror, on the wall. Yes the background tells it all. THIS is my all-time favorite lesson about online dating. Men and women, when you are looking at profile photos, look at the background, especially the self-photos in someone’s bedroom or bathroom. Is there a mess? Is the bed made? What does the furniture look like? Is it dumpy or well kept? Are there dirty clothes all over the floor? See? There is ALOT to learn just in the background noise. Ok, ok. Listen to this. In one profile picture, I could actually see the outline of a woman’s body STILL IN THE BED! Seriously, a guy took a picture of himself in the bedroom dresser mirror and his wife/girlfriend was asleep in the bed behind him. UN-believable!
10) Oops, I forgot to take off the wedding ring! A humorous activity for me is to catch someone’s photo where they are still wearing their wedding ring. That’s a gas! I have actually called men out on it. I have been told that it’s an old photo and I have heard that they are recently divorced with the picture being a bit old. And, of course, I have been told, “Yep. I am still married.” Oops, gotcha.
11) Sunglass city. Look in the mirrored sunglasses. What do you see? If you look closely at someone who is wearing mirrored sunglasses in their picture, you can often see the picture-taker. That is very revealing, especially when you ask them about the picture. It’s a fun little mind-game to play.
Well, that is it for now. I love the picture game. There is so much to be learned, if we just look….
Much love,
Shawn
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